Good Evening lovely people of the world! I had so many internal battles with myself today. Starting with my dream last night, in which I ate three pieces of cheese, and even in the dream realized how bad that was. Woke up in relief to find that it was just a dream. Who dreams about cheese as the enemy? So messed up.
Today is Day 2 of Purification, where we are supposed to clean our houses, organize, and get rid of the extra stuff we don't need basically. There are great homemade recipes for non-toxic cleaners and things like that. But hey, I'm a college kid, and my house is pretty clean right now, and I just didn't have any energy to think about anything else but the challenge of not eating protein today. I walked into today like it was no big deal, as yesterday was pretty much okay. I was wrong. Today was pretty hard. I woke up around 9am and after drinking my quart of warm lemon water and green smoothie became really discouraged at the realization that I would not be able to have anything but fruits and vegetables to look forward to and 'sustain' me. I didn't want to just sit around the house all day either though, so, possibly stupidly of me, I decided to go to the bar with my friends at 3:30pm to watch the Patriots game. Being around pizza and wings, nachos, cheesy things galore really was like torture, more-so than any other day I've experienced before because I had nothing to fill that void. Everything I've eaten today only made me more hungry and just seemed to instantly dissolve in my stomach. I realize I sound ridiculous to a certain degree, because it's only a day and I am lucky to know I will have food tomorrow, but I just have to give you that perspective. The waitress at first, when I told her I have such a specific request was fine, but then when I told her I can't have tomatoes or oranges either she looked at me like I was crazy. I said "I'm on a cleanse" and she said with a scrunched nose "Why? You're so skinny?" That was nice to hear hahaaha but I told her it was for allergy testing and I have to do it because I got asked to blog about it. (Those aren't the only reasons, of course, my intention is much bigger than that, but to make her understand that's what I said). She said "Oh, well if you're blogging about it then I guess it's okay, it's what you have to do". Anyways, we stayed for the entire game, I ate my special requested plates, as countless plates of delicious, sustaining food was served around me, amazing scents wafting through the air, and I made it out alive-- scotch free-- but I never want to do that again!
I came back home after my "meals" which you'll see below, and slept for 2 hours. Then, because the book says we can transition out of Purification, we can have 2 to 4 ounces of protein, I had a slice of turkey, then a date roll and an entire avocado. I neeeeeeded it. I'm currently drinking dandelion root tea and I have a chicken breast in the oven because if I'm going to last the rest of the night I'll really have to have that.
Today I'm going to break down my meals in a different way, because they don't deserve the titles "Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner", it'll just make me sad to see those titles. And I've never wanted a piece of chicken or an almond or a seed or an avocado more in my life. Ever. Like please dear harvest god give me some sustenance. (Do note though, I am not miserable in a moody way today-- although I know that sounds hard to believe-- my emotions are pretty steady, I am just starved and being a baby). The only thing about today was I felt a little cramped up after the mangos and apples, but it went away shortly after. I didn't have any headaches, or any other symptoms other than my stomach hurting from being so hungry. I think this is an awesome sign that my body is free of lots of toxins, but I'm sure my body is saying "Okay lady, we're clear, you're good; you don't have any toxins, now give us something other than veggies already!"
- 1 quart warm lemon water
- 1/2 green juice smoothie (couldn't finish it all because I didn't want it) (kale, lemon juice, cucumber, apple)
- 1 date roll (aka two dates smushed and rolled in unsweetened coconut)
- French greens with steamed brussels sprouts, snow pea shoots, fresh garlic, 1 tbs olive oil, carrots on the side. (Immediately starved right after)
- green frozen grapes-- maybe 12, still so hungry
- water, water, water
In the car to the bar:
- 1 Ella's Kitchen peach, apple, banana, lemon juice puree
At the bar:
- big spinach salad with olive oil on the side, lemon squeezes, onion, carrrot, green apple slices (Notice the wings in the background...kill me now)
- Mango and apple cut up (now notice the pizza... see it... just over the crest of my fruit..... )
- Ella's Kitchen Green puree (kiwi, banana, green apple, pear, lemon juice)
- 5 glasses of ice water with lemon throughout
- date roll
- turkey slice
- cauliflower mash-- aka 1/2 cauliflower head [I wanted more but now I am out of cauliflower] steamed, blasted in Nutribullet with roasted garlic and a pinch of olive oil, sea salt, black pepper--- quiteeeee delicious.
Later, after my nap:
- 1 avocado
Later, aka while typing this....
- 1/2 chicken breast (3oz) AND OMG IT TASTED LIKE HEAVEN!!!!!!!
SOOOO Excited for tomorrow to feel amazing and eat real food. I love sustenance. Don't pity me, obviously I pity myself enough for the both of us ; ). Goodness gracious... this is what it's like to be a foodie without food.
I already hear the music pumping downstairs, and people arriving, time to take a shower finally and be a good host. Running on low fuel, but you only college once right? Tomorrow's a holiday, I'll sleep in.